005 - Video

[used_friendship]

[It's late in the evening and thankfully Naruto is not yelling through the Pokegear for once. In fact he isn't anywhere near as energetic as he usually is.]

Y'know when you can't contact someone on the Pokegear thingies and some of their Pokemon have been sat in your room starin' at you most the evening, that usually means the person's gone right?

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[godaime]

[ Enjoy the wrinkles. She'll continue to pat Naruto on the back and clutch him. ]

Life isn't fair. We all deal with losses, and it's upsetting you've dealt with yours more than once. But, you and I both know that if your mom saw you crying over not having her around while her pokémon emptily stare at you, we might not have a house left to stand in. [ Tsunade: she gives the worst pep talks! ]

action;

[believeit]

[Not even listening sorry

hugs


boobs


face


granny

boobs

face

teenage boy

help




help]

action; || This thread took a wrong turn from heartwarming to heartawful

[godaime]

[ Tsunade detects some fumbling and, suffice to say, she interpets it very very wrongly.

How wrongly? Well, Naruto, there's a giant, angry, granny fist flying right towards your face. ]

I can't believe you'd take advantage of this opportunity!

action; || It really did jfc

[believeit]

[He screeches at being hit, but at least she's now let go of him.

Taking a step back and POINTING AT HER.]

I wasn't doin' anything, you were TRYING TO SUFFOCATE ME Y'KNOW!!?

Action || Sorry for the delay! Sudden out of town trip is the culprit! || this escalated so quickly

[godaime]

Why would I try to suffocate you? I was just giving you a hug. Not my fault Senju Strength™ has a tendency to be a little strong sometimes. You were trying to fondle me! With your face! [ Ironically, Tsunade has had this exact conversation with Jiraiya. Except that was more of a "his fault" situation. ]

Action || It's fine! || and haha yes it did

[believeit]

I wasn't fondling you, you were suffocating me with.. with.. THOSE!

Action

[godaime]

I wasn't suffocating you with anything! What type of ninja with a strength like yours gets suffocated by a pair of breasts? [ She'll match Naruto's expression. ] Tch! You really are just like Jiraiya!

Action

[believeit]

No I'm not! He would've done it on purpose! [HIS WAS ACCIDENTAL AND FORCED BY YOU OK]

Action

[godaime]

And then he'd try blaming me even though I'm the offended party in this situation. [ IF NARUTO DIDN'T LIKE IT HE COULD MOVE HIS NECK TO GRACEFULLY TOUCH HER SHOULDER IN A TENDER AND LOVING MOMENT. ]

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[believeit]

Argh can we quit talking about this now, it's weird!

1/2

[godaime]

Fine!! This is making me angry anyways!

2/2

[godaime]

I'm really sorry she's gone, however. If you need anyone else, especially if it's someone with a maternal instinct, well I raised a whole village. [ Substitute mommy tbh. Minato is cougarbait in this situation all other arguments or courses of action are invalid. ]

[believeit]

Well, you're already Granny Tsunade. I'm not gonna ask you to be my Mom, that's weird.

[godaime]

It's probably the safest decision anyways. You'd be raised a lot differently if you were my kid! [ She's fine with being grandma. She can't cook and she's not very pleasant to be near, but at least she adjusted for inflation. ]

[believeit]

Yeah, that would probably be weird and I'd probably turn out scary like Sakura-chan did. But you're still family anyway, right? I mean- to me. Kinda.

[godaime]

Heh. You'd turn out to be the strongest ninja and kage ever! [ Congratulations to Sakura for being the most resilient woman ever. ]

Of course. You call me granny, and, no matter how much I wished that term didn't stick, it did. Just like how Jiraiya trained your father and then you.

[believeit]

You mean you don't think I will anyway? [Does this look like the face of the future best-hokage-ever? Sure does!]

[godaime]

You still have a long way to go before you trump me or your daddy. And an even longer way to go to beat my granddad. [ FAMILY PRIDE: THE CONVERSATION. ]

[believeit]

Yeah. But I will! [Just look at all that determination oozing off of him.]

[godaime]

Heh. I'll be sure keep an eye on that! I expect you to be coming to me for advice when I think you're ready to take the helm. [ wait til she learns everyone else in konoha wants to be hokage... ]

[believeit]

You got it! Thanks, Granny! [Aww look at that, she really did help cheer him up a bit.]

i offer no apologies to where my next tag will take this

[godaime]

You're welcome, Naruto! Now, you know what we should do?

:o

[believeit]

[...?]

What?

[godaime]

We should get you your very own tentacool hat! [ YES SHE IS GRABBING ONTO NARUTO'S HAND AND TRYING TO USHER HIM INTO THE GREAT OUTDOORS™. ]

[believeit]

A...what? [Suddenly he's being dragged somewhere and- what is going on?]

A Tenta-what-now? Granny? Ehhh?